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Jennifer M Oliver
I am a photographer, animal advocate & advocate for rheumatic diseases.
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Sunday, January 2, 2011

PostHeaderIcon Happy 2011 Everyone!

I just wanted to stop in quickly and wish you all a Happy New Year and that you all had a great holiday season no matter what religion you are.  Hopefully you all are also able to get some rest before starting back to the grind tomorrow!  Its been an eventful year for me & I look very forward to all that 2011 holds!  I am even hoping to be able to write even more rants for you all who enjoy them so much!  Thank you to all of you who take the time to read them and encourage me to keep writing more of them! Sending much love to all of you! 

PostHeaderIcon My Reflection of 2010 - My last 2010 Rant

*I did originally type this up on 12/30/10 on my FB page, but thought I would share it all with you here as well*

Well, after re-reading my reflection of 2009, and getting all misty eyed, I decided with New Years Eve looming tomorrow and I wont have a chance to write this before the clock strikes 12, I best hurry my pert bottom up, and write this years reflections down.

It has truely been an amazing and roller-coaster filled ride this year that is for sure and once again, turned out to be, nothing at all like I'd expected lol  Theres still been good and bads and in betweens, but I have to confess, over all, its been an amazingly good year.

In January I had to say good bye to my dad, when he lost his battle vs pancreatic cancer, which still tears me up thinking about it, doing things like celebrating his birthday or fathers day or all those special moments, or those little things that remind me of him, like seeing a train go by... that happen and knowing I cant call him are the hardest.  I think it will be a long time yet before I can look at a photo or think about him and not get teared up.  

The start of the year I was under a lot of stress, December 2009 and January 2010 were the hardest I've been through in some time.  

Springtime came, and my friend Vincent finished College and moved away, so things were sad, as I didnt know many people at all still, I had no cable or internet and times were also very tight and tough.  I wasnt even sure at the time if all my pep talks to myself about pulling myself up by  my bootstraps would work at the time....I did a lot of reading, and spent a lot of time up at the library.....and a lot of time pondering the simple things....

I finally got the okay to have the start of my dental work done, which was painful but worth every ounce...I also got my new glasses....and that helped more than words can say with my own esteem.  I even pondered at one point, moving back to the coast, and then everything changed.

At the end of spring Patti and I started hanging out a lot more, I started helping her more with the puppies and we started a long journey which will go on for a long time yet lol  Sorry girl, youre stuck with me for a while yet haha  I helped out with my first litter that June, and also helped Patti deal with the tragic loss of her beloved MooMoo. I also fell in love with Miss Delli & Stelli who truely stole my heart.  We've learned a lot from each other and been there for each other rough and choppy waters.... Weve learned too we make quiet a team.  From her I even learned to take my photography up a notch and learned a few tricks on how to pose fur-babies too lol She encouraged me and patiently showed me tips and tricks with my photography as well...and Ive taught her how to use a pc and a new cell phone lol

I even started using her camera to take photos of her furbabies and mine.  We got her website started as well, and have slowly gotten her business more solidly built and have grown into very good friends.  Through her Ive also gotten to meet more people and she even drags my lazy butt out and about with her wherever she travels; including our now chaotic errand days.  With her I've finally gotten to see parts of Saskatchewan, some remote southern alberta areas, and I even got to see Calgary at last haha.  

Just before summer hit us head on, my nephew Adam Peter was born at long last weighing in at a whopping 9lbs 3oz.  My SIL got my deepest sympathies lol It has been amazing getting to see the photos of him as he grows through time and I cannot wait to see him next month at long last!  Hes a big boy for sure, and is likely as mischevious as his daddy no doubt lol  

Over the summer Patti went on holidays, and I helped Pinkie Pie whelp her first litter all by my lonesome, now its not nearly so terrifying lol  But it was an amazing and exhausting experiance lol  And Patti and her family helped me ring in my 34th birthday with joy and much erm cheer lol  It was an amazing day filled with lots of laughter, cake, burgers from the grill, "cheer" and much dancing (apparently i dont recall lol)...the morning after however was not so nice lol

Ive celebrated both my girls' birthdays and the fact that weve spent so much time together and lookign forward to so much more.  I cannot even recall what living without them was like sometimes.  They are my world and mean the world to me even if some might not understand it. 

As fall hit, my second nephew was born, as my sister welcomed her new son, Holden, and he surprised us all by being yes, bigger than Adam lol  So that has been an adventure as well!  

As winters befallen us yet again I got my new camera, of my very own.  The newest and most expensive thing ive ever bought myself lol  However, I also started up 2 online shops and also not one but two websites of my own (which I truely hope to see flourish in 2011) I have had much encouragement about my old passion turned into (hopefully) a thriving business....and it too has done wonders for my esteem; ive also become a part of pattis business as well, which reduces my stress and although keeps us running most days, keeps a smile on my face and joy in my heart.....

So here I sit, reflecting on how much things have changed this year, and how different it was from what I thought it would be, and yet it was one that although started out depressing and rough, ended up becoming an amazing year with much laughter, a few tears, meeting many new and amazing friends, reconnecting with old friends and even family too.
Ive learned alot, and grown even more too.  I had high hopes for this year and in many ways lots of that happened, most of it just in ways I never could have expected or predicted either lol  

Ive discovered more about myself, my inner strength and standing on my own two feet, Ive discovered I'm stronger than many think often times and that I have a strong voice & even how to use it (you will all get to see more of that this coming year lol sorry lol)  I get homesick still, but its not as bad as it was last year, (i think my twilight fixes help seeing the ocean and greenery too lol thats my story and im sticking to it lol)  and although I look forward to my holidays home to see everyone, I know this is definately where I belong and I am truely happy here.  

So, finally, the last part of my Reflections.  What do I look forward to and expect for 2011....well, thats a handful lol
I look forward to, come hell or highwater, attending my BFFs wedding in Alaska if I have to swim or/and hitch-hike there; and helping her preserve the memories of her super special day, by being her photographer.  I look forward to seeing both of my new nephews as well as my adorable niece grow and learn and thrive.  I look forward to (heres hoping) watching my businesses grow as well, and me becoming what Ive always dreamed.  Truely independant.  I look forward to watching all the fur-babies learn and grow and all the laughter they share with us each day.  I hope to find a GP still waiting, in Medicine Hat, and getting my physical  health back on track, now that mentally Im feeling better at least.   I look forward to turning my suite from a simple barren suite, into a warm and inviting home, compete with knick knacks real furniture and more lol  

So heres to you all my online friends, my friends, my family both close and estranged; to friends new to friends old and everywhere in between.  Thank you for all of your love, encouragement and support this past year which has meant so very very much to me in a year that started out a living hell, and has slowly turned into more of a paradise.  I am happy to say, I cannot wait to greet 2011 and all of its surprises that it will bring!  

Happy New Year Everyone!!!! I hope its been an amazing one for you all too, see you all in 2011!!!!
Friday, December 24, 2010

PostHeaderIcon Merry Christmas Everyone!

Just thought I would stop and take a quick moment before I head out to start our happy festivities here, to wish each and every one of you a safe & Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!  Its been a roller coaster year and I cant wait to start posting more here in the New Year! Cheers!
Thursday, January 28, 2010

PostHeaderIcon Of Fact Or Fiction?

I thought when I’d left the world of a small town behind, you know one of those tiny out of the way towns where everyone knows everyone’s business within five minutes of it happening, that I had left the small world of Rumorsville behind. I was soon to find out how wrong I was, however, the source of it, both amused and disturbed me.


Like many people nowadays I’m addicted to my PC. I love my internet and hate going without it. I constantly am checking my email, my Facebook and other forums I belong to. I know I’m defiantly not alone in this addiction; lots of us suffer from it. How many of us constantly get those fun emails stating that if you don’t pass them on, for example, Hotmail will suddenly shut down; or another famous one, if you don’t add it to your Facebook status, then Facebook will close down. When I started to think about how many things get passed along in this fashion, many of them being total fiction, few of them being true, and many a mixture of both truth and fiction; I realized, I hadn’t left Rumorville behind, it had followed me online.

It does leave me pondering why is it, as humans, we have this compulsion to share things we either know are false or even share it before we know; not knowing what the consequences might be. Even though we live in an age where information is at our fingertips and it’s often easy to find out if things are truthful or lies; still we don’t take the time to think before we “share”.

I wonder how long it will continue to happen, in cyberspace and in real life as well. Is it merely human nature, and something that cannot be fixed? Or something that with a little work, all of us can become more conscious about, and possibly change?
Wednesday, January 6, 2010

PostHeaderIcon A Walk In Someone Elses Shoes

Imagine for just a moment that you are once again a child. Your life stretched out in front of you. Your world is full of dreams of what is yet to come. The sky is the limit. And, although it has its shinning moments of tribulation and social awkwardness, life is generally good. There is nothing you cannot do; all that you really have to do is decide what you want to become. Ah, life is grand.


Now imagine for a moment that you are told that you have a rare invisible illness. You are no longer like every other child playmate or relative of yours. You are different and you have no idea why.

Your world now revolves around doctor appointments, medical exams and tests. You are told you are no longer able to do the physical activities you once enjoyed; like running or playing. You are in constant pain that no one can see the cause of. People tell you that you whine a lot and to suck it up. You have no energy from the pain; you cannot figure out why all you want to do is sleep all the time. People just call you lazy. You are given medicines and told to take them. You don’t understand why, you just do as they say. You can’t figure out why it’s so hard now to remember the simple things. You think you are going insane. And often times, even worse, think you are stupid.

No, you don’t have some bizarre illness that no ones heard of. You have one that everyone has heard of, and they think they know everything about it, and yet, know very little. You have a rheumatic illness.

Most people don’t realize that billions of children world-wide have this disease. They do not realize that it doesn’t just cause “achy bones” that a few Tylenol can help ease. They don’t realize that there are over 115 different types of rheumatic illnesses; all of which affect the body in various ways, and not just the bones. They can also affect organs, muscles, skin, and other various body parts. Thankfully, some will out-grow their rheumatic illness; as in the case of Jr. Rheumatoid Arthritis. Many more, however, will not, and will suffer on through teenage years and into adulthood; where they will continue to be misunderstood.

It is difficult for anyone who has a chronic illness, and doubly so to have it as a child or young adult. It makes it even harder when you are constantly bombarded by people who think they know the magic cure-all pill and people who think you are a liar because “you look just fine” to them.

I know what this is like because I was diagnosed at age 9 with Jr. Rheumatoid Arthritis in Seattle. I was re-diagnosed by the Arthritis Society in Vancouver, BC with Mixed Connective Tissue Disease; which is Rheumatoid Arthritis, Polymyositis, Sjogrens Syndrome, Vasculitis, Raynauds Syndrome & SLE (Lupus) at age 14. I was one of 12 children in Canada with this disease; and only one of 50 in North America.

I went through the barrage of X-Rays, CT Scans, EEGs, EKG’s, vast amounts of blood work and more to get this figured out. I had to deal with Rheumatologists, Physiotherapists, Occupational Therapists, Ophthalmologists and more specialists than I can shake a stick at. That was before I even turned 15.

I had to deal with teachers who couldn’t understand why I had to take time off school to constantly be at a doctor appointment or due to bed rest; or why I couldn’t do things like P.E. I had to deal with peers who couldn’t comprehend what I had to deal with. It made for a fairly lonely existence in school.

And if I ever thought that I had it bad, my mother had it worse. She knew when I was 18 months old that I had arthritis. She talked to my pediatrician about it, to which he replied only old people get it, she was just over reacting. When I started getting calcium deposits on my hands and toes; she again voiced her concerns. Again, no one listened. At age 9, I was living with my father and step-mother in Seattle and my stepmother was an Orthopedics RN. She realized after talking to my mother that she was right, something wasn’t quite right. She realized watching me with my cousins that when I sat on the floor, I couldn’t get back up on my own. I had great difficulties doing so. In fact, I looked like one of her senior patients trying to get up. So she started pushing the doctors to run more tests. I was one of the lucky few. Many go undiagnosed by the medical professionals and ignored by their parents as well. Pain is chalked up to “growing pains”, the exhaustion is due to being “lazy” or lack of proper sleeping habits. It’s often not until they are young adults that they find out what they have.

As adults, they will likely face much of what I have. Those who cannot afford a post-secondary education will likely end up doing entry level work and end up doing more damage to their joints. They will deal with bosses who have little comprehension (and often really don’t care) about why they have limitations or have to take time off work. They will deal with the brain fog caused by flare ups and also by some of the medications. They will deal with a vicious cycle of over-working their body to the point they have to take time off, causing them to stress out about finances, which causes their health to become increasingly worse. They will deal with all the psychological issues that accompany having an invisible illness; as well as be misunderstood co-workers and friends who don’t truly understand what they are going through; and often call them lazy as well. After all, it can’t kill you right? Wrong.

Then as a last resort, when their bodies finally hit rock bottom, after numerous trips to the hospital and doctors offices; they will try to apply to some government agency for help.

After all, isn’t that what they are there for? There they will deal with professionals who also have no idea what their illness is about, and once again being stigmatized as “looking fine” and just “being lazy”. Some will even be called liars. Some will not be able to work again. Some will just need aid being retrained to do a more appropriate job and then go on to lead independent lives again.

All of them will need understanding along the way from diagnosis right on through til the day they die. They will need medical & dental professionals, employers, teachers, and even government workers to understand what a rheumatic disease is and how it can affect a person. What their limitations truly are; and what their needs truly are from each of them.

Medical professionals need to be able to spot the zebra in the herd of horses and quickly diagnose children with rheumatic diseases and stop chalking it up to always being something else because kids can’t get it. Dental professionals need to understand some rheumatic diseases cause mouth decay and abscesses and it’s not due to lack of brushing. But there are ways to prevent some of it. Teachers need to understand the limitations physically and even mentally that children (and yes even young adults returning to post secondary) have; due to medications as “brain fog” caused by flare ups. Employers need to understand that there are limitations and work with their disabled employees. Many want to work, they just need the opportunity; along with the proper work place. Government workers need to stop judging them as lazy because they aren’t on crutches or need a guide dog. Just because things look fine on the exterior doesn’t mean there’s not trouble brewing under the surface that you cannot see.

And last but not least, YOU, the friends and family; the neighbors and co-workers of those with a rheumatic illness need to educate yourself as well; which is why I am writing this to begin with.

They need your understanding and support. They don’t need to be mollycoddled; nor do they want pity. Most will over-compensate and overdo things just to be “normal”. They need you to know that some days, yes they will feel spry and fine; and some days they will not have the energy to lift their heads off the pillow. They need you to understand some days they will feel blue as the sea and others angry at the world, and sometimes just fine. They need you to understand some areas they cannot live in due to climate – even if it breaks their hearts being far from home. They need you to not think that it isn’t a serious illness that can put them into the hospital, that it does affect organs and other body parts than just their bones. They need you to be supportive. And they need you to help educate others, so that eventually, there will be no misconceptions. They need you to help raise awareness to that everyone knows about this disease as much as they do about other diseases like cancer or diabetes. They need you to help fight for research to be done on this illness that has been around since the dawn of time, so that one day; there will be a cure; and maybe; just maybe, the next generation of children won’t have to go through what we did.

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